I am a devotee of Sri Ramakrishna. Few days back, I lost my husband and I strongly believe that pouring out my worries to Sri Ramakrishna is my only console. But going to temple is prohibited for a widow during mourning period. Shall I pray by going to Sri Ramakrishna Math? - Smt. Nirmala Variar, Ernakulam, Kerala.
Answer: I pray to Bhagavan Sri Ramakrishna for your husband’s departed soul to attain the lotus feet of The Lord.
There are rules for going to traditional temples during defilement. Though Sri Ramakrishna respected those customs and beliefs, He was more concerned about the betterment of the human mind during the period of grief.
Sri Ramakrishna is the wisdom-fire, meaning "Gnanaagni", who regulates all sorts of negative thinking, feelings and forces.
The loss and grief of a person’s demise affect his dear ones and they have to live with these sorrow-filled minds. In such circumstances, praying to their Ishta-Devatha definitely gives confidence and strength to them. More than a blood-relative's consoling word, the faith that comes out of God’s grace perpetuates a person on the right path, particularly, after a very dear one's loss.
Relatives and friends lament and cry out loud in a house, after the demise of a dear one; as they do not know how to handled their emotions.
Talking about the virtues and values of a dead person is rare nowadays. But devotees of Sri Ramakrishna hold Him tight at their pains and gains. They never become inconsolable by their agonies and they never get carried away by them.
A moving incident from the book of - Sri Ramakrishna, the Great Master:
Manimohan, a devotee of Sri Ramakrishna lost his adolescent son. After his funeral, the grief-stricken Manimohan rushed to Sri Ramakrishna. By seeing his grief, Gurumaharaj gave him courage and made him understand the impermanence of the worldly relation. He also made him realize that, 'One who surrenders himself to God never gets inundated by grief after the loss of their loved ones. In case if they stagger, they become calm and stable after a while".
Sri Ramakrishna further clarified that at the time of miseries, only the grace of a Gurudev and Ishta-Devatha could bless them with a strong and clear mind.
Perceiving the empathy of Sri Ramakrishna, Manimohan bowed and uttered with folded hands and his heart filled with gratitude and peace:
“Master! Who else than you can mitigate the blazing fire of my dead son’s sorrow burning in me? That is the reason I rushed to you avoiding all other people for consolation” and surrendered himself to Sri Ramakrishna.
Sister, like Manimohan, surrender your worries at the feet of Sri Ramakrishna; else the emotional, verbal consolation of your relatives, though they are good enough, might weaken your body and mind.
When mercury spills out and one tries to take up, it just greases his hands. But the same mercury if pipetted and converted into gas, it becomes a blazing light.
Death-grief is similar to liquid mercury. Continuously weeping on your husband’s demise makes your life miserable. Henceforth, tune up your mind to the saviour, Sri Ramakrishna. If you keep weeping, your life will become a source of sorrow and misery; instead think, that "teacher" sorrow has given you an experience that will be a lesson for your life.Continuously weeping on your husband’s demise makes your life miserable. Henceforth, tune up your mind to the saviour, Sri Ramakrishna. If you keep weeping, your life will become a source of sorrow and misery; instead think, that "teacher" sorrow has given you an experience that will be a lesson for your life.
Sister, come out of your pathos agony and go to Sri Ramakrishna who takes away all our grief and pain by HIS unconditional love.
Swami Vimurtananda
28 February, 2021
Ramakrishna Math, Thanjavur